Commentary:
Sharks, squids, and mysteries? I'm just here for the suntan and the beach selfies! 🦈🌊📸
750 Funny love quotes
Kiss me like you’re trying to damn my soul and save it in the same breath.
Commentary:
That's one spicy exorcism 😏💋👻
Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.
Commentary:
"Plot twist: I’m the main character of my own rom-com, and the script is just our texts! 📚😂💕"
Real lovers are currently single, by the way.
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True love is just on a really long coffee break ☕️😄💘
I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”
Commentary:
When even your echo puts you in the friend zone 😂🌬️ #ForeverAlone
I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're caught in the plot twist of a rom-com! 🍿🎬💔😅
I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when I’m buying things for myself.
Commentary:
Just doing my part to stimulate the economy, one cart at a time! 🛒💸😂
Having a crush should be considered a form of self-harm.
Commentary:
Crushing hard: the only exercise that guarantees a ton of feelings and zero calories. 💔🤦♂️😆
And for my next trick, I’m going to miss you in a million unspoken ways.
Commentary:
Master of Disappearing Acts: Now you see me, now I'm awkwardly missing you while pretending to be busy! 🤹♂️✨😅
There’s endless songs out there about love and pain and life, but basically only one about the wheels on the bus. Just goes to show you they nailed it the first try.
Commentary:
Who knew the real lyrical genius was a preschool songwriter? 🎶🚌 #OneHitWonder