271 Funny phone quotes

• Sorry for texting back instantly. My phone is in my hand, I’m mature, and I like you.

  ---

  13 hours ago

  apology, back, communication, flirting, hand, humor, i, instant, instant reply, mature, maturity, phone, relationship, reply, sorry, texting

• Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

  ---

  1 week ago

  addiction, analogy, casino, distraction, humor, phone, steal, technology, time

• Living alone is so dumb, you’ll be asking your pets if they’ve seen your phone, and those lazy bastards never know.

  ---

  1 week ago

  alone, asking, bastards, dumb, forgetfulness, humor, know, lazy, lazy pet, living, living alone, never, pet, pets, phone, seen, talking, talking to pet

• People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

  ---

  1 week ago

  6, daily, daily routine, day, entertainment, every, habit, hours, humor, irony, movie, people, phone, phones, routine, screen, screen time, scroll, time, watch, watching, watching habit, wonder

• Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

  ---

  1 week ago

  advice, communication, download, humor, important, listen, outlook, phone, someone, Teams, technology, work

• Someone needs to invent a theater seat that forcefully ejects you through the roof if you take your phone out during a movie.

  ---

  1 week ago

  distraction, etiquette, humor, invent, invention, movie, needs, phone, roof, seat, someone, take, technology, theater, theater seat, through

• I miss when people didn’t talk on speakerphone in public.

  ---

  1 week ago

  annoyance, call, communication, etiquette, i, miss, nostalgia, people, phone, phone call, public, speakerphone, talk

• I feel like smashing my phone would be cathartic.

  ---

  1 week ago

  catharsis, emotional, emotional release, feel, frustration, humor, i, impulse, phone, release, relief, smashing, stress, stress relief, technology

• Jokes on you, unknown number. I barely answer my phone for people I know.

  ---

  2 weeks ago

  answer, avoidance, call, communication, humor, i, interaction, joke, jokes, know, number, people, phone, social, social interaction, unknown, unknown number

• Best time to reach me is when I’m at work. Don’t bother me when I’m at home.

  ---

  2 weeks ago

  best, bother, boundary, call, communication, home, humor, me, phone, phone call, reach, time, timing, work

All funny phone quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌