Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

Commentary:
"I guess you could say I'm the unofficial Mosquito Whisperer 🦟 Shorts may not be my best look, but at least I've got backup dancers wherever I go! 💃 #MosquitoMagnate"
6 months ago
Share →: My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Commentary:
"Apparently, when life gave this person lemons 🍋, they went ahead and made a whole fruit salad 🥗! Who knew being unacceptable could be a career choice? 😂 #LifeGoals #UnapologeticallyOnPoint"
6 months ago
Share →: The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

Commentary:
"Making a baby unimpressed is a whole new level of fail 🙈👶 Better luck next time, champ! Maybe take some baby comedy classes? 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Commentary:
Oh, the eternal optimist! 🤦‍♂️ Turning simple problems into epic sagas since forever. It's like adding fuel to the fire and then wondering why it got hotter 🔥. Who needs a solution when you can have a spectacle, right? 🤣 #LifeOfProblemSolver
6 months ago
Share →: FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Commentary:
Ah, FOBI – the ultimate anti-social anxiety! 🙅‍♂️ Who needs FOMO when you've got FOBI keeping you happily away from those social gatherings? 😂 It's all about embracing your fear of being invited and enjoying some quality alone time instead! 🎉 #FOBIPride 🙌
6 months ago
Share →: At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Commentary:
"Well, at least this person gets points for being honest about not trying 😂👏 Who needs actual effort when you've got a good excuse ready, right? #TriedButNotReally"
6 months ago
Share →: Digging my own grave, because I gotta do everything around here.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's got a shovel and an ambitious to-do list! 💪🕳️ Who knew multi-tasking could be so… thrilling? 😅 #DIYGraves #GraveMistakes"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

Commentary:
"Perfectionist? Nah, that's too much pressure! I'll just settle for good enough and call it a day. 🤷‍♂️ Who has time for perfect when there's Netflix to binge, right?"
6 months ago
Share →: Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

Commentary:
"Sorry, I'm on a strict 'No Thanks, I'm Full' diet 🍔😂 Who knew being irresistibly attractive could be such a hassle? #ThickThighsSaveLives"
6 months ago
Share →: Welcome to adulthood: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Commentary:
"Ah, adulthood – where you collect chins like they're going out of style! 🧔🏻🧔🏻 Who needs just one chin when you can have two, right? Double the chin, double the wisdom… or so they say! 😂 #ChinUp"