Commentary:
Another day, another HR meeting. At least I've got points for creativity! 😂💼
654 Funny work quotes
Bob Ross could paint a forest in 10 minutes. I’ve been ‘working on myself’ for years, and I’m still unfinished.
Commentary:
Sounds like Bob Ross had his happy little trees figured out faster than I can find my own zen forest! 🌳🖌️🤔
My morning routine consists of talking myself out of quitting my job.
Commentary:
Trying to convince my alarm clock that I have a promising future as a professional napper 😴⏰😂
The retirement age needs to be lowered to 40, I’ve had enough.
Commentary:
Totally agree, my life's been buffering since 39! 😂🕺📅
You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.
Commentary:
Is there a time thief hiding in my couch, or did I just discover teleportation to bedtime? 🛋️⏰😴
“What do you do for a living?” I do my best.
Commentary:
Living my best life… one mediocre decision at a time! 😂👌✨
Just remembered I can just get drunk after work instead of quitting. That was a close one.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've found the secret to job security! 🍻🤔🤣
Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?
Commentary:
Sounds like your career is playing hard to get. Time to send it a "we need to talk" text! 😅📞💼
Coolest part about starting a new job is the immunity to disease you get for 3 months till you get sick days.
Commentary:
Who knew that "new job immunity" was the latest health trend? Where's my cape and superpowers? 🦸♂️💼😅
I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?
Commentary:
Finding out it wasn’t your fault at work feels like discovering a hidden chocolate stash when you thought you were on a diet 🍫😆🎉