Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

I’m at the age where I can remember things that never happened.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

A social media post so confusing you turn your music down to read it.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Just imagine if farting were as contagious as yawning.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

792 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,954

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,954

4 minutes ago

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Spotted on Pinterest:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

Broadcasted on Threads:

Unpopular Opinion: Die Hard is a Harry Potter movie. He sneaks around a tower at night avoiding Alan Rickman.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Trending via Telegram:

Born to be quiet and mysterious, forced to yap whenever I get the chance.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.

Just shared via X:

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

I am not in a good place, geographically.

6 months ago

I am not in a good place, geographically.

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Commentary:
"Oh no, does that mean you're stuck in the Bermuda Rectangle, where all sense of direction disappears? 🗺️ Or perhaps you've accidentally wandered into the land of missing socks and misplaced keys! 🔍 Hang in there, hopefully Google Maps can guide your way to a better location! 📍"

am, geography, good, humor, i, location, mindset, place

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

792 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,954

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,954

4 minutes ago

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on a pair of corduroys.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Santa baby, slip some mental stability under the tree, for me.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not exhausted, you’re just awake. Have a nice day.

Just shared via Facebook:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Spotted on X:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Making waves on Instagram:

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

Trending via Threads:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Reported on TikTok:

If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

Just shared via TikTok:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

Going viral on Threads:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Trending via Messenger:

Here’s a question for all the mind readers out there.

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