Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs roses when you can have mozzarella sticks? 🧀🌹 For those who prefer cheesy goodness over flowers, this is the ultimate dream bouquet! Just make sure to have some marinara dipping sauce on the side. 😂 #SnackGoals"

bouquet, cheese, craving, food, humor, i, mozzarella, snack, wish

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

2 months ago

advice, big, change, decades, doctor, drinking, going, health, humor, i, long-term, me, routine, sobriety, stop
Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

2 months ago

answer, challenges, choices, door, give, humor, lemons, life, perspective, positivity
BREAKING: OpenAI to partner with OpenAI to help fund OpenAI. OpenAI up 90%.

3 months ago

90, breaking, breaking news, business, finance, fund, funding, help, humor, news, OpenAI, partner, partnership, stock
I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

3 months ago

confidence, different, humor, just, levels, never, perspective, right, self-assurance, wrong
Every email sent to me should end with ‘but if your tummy is hurting, don’t worry about it.’

2 months ago

email, end, every, funny request, humor, me, request, sent, should, tummy, worry
Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

2 months ago

biological, biological clock, clock, dating, deadline, final, humor, men, pressure, prove, relationship, weakness, worthiness

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

15 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

68 shares on Threads this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

23 shares on Slack this month:

Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

49 shares on WeChat this month:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

God gives the most irritable bowels to the most beautiful angels.

44 shares on Slack this month:

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

Tuesday is just Monday wearing a fake mustache.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

Can I sell my feelings on ebay, I don’t want them anymore.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I would love to see AI be unemployed.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

One day you’re 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you’re 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

People who often talk to themselves are more intelligent than others. At least that’s what I tell myself.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer to the end you get, the faster it goes.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

Just landed via TikTok:

If you’re cheering for the stormtroopers, we cannot be friends.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Just shared via Instagram:

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

Trending via X:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Trending via WeChat:

I’d like to know what my dog is thinking as he watches me try one outfit after another while getting ready for a party.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Going bananas on Instagram:

Ever been in the car with someone who drives so fast that you press your imaginary brakes on the passenger side?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

BREAKING: OpenAI to partner with OpenAI to help fund OpenAI. OpenAI up 90%.

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Every email sent to me should end with ‘but if your tummy is hurting, don’t worry about it.’

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨