Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Hmm, let's hope I'm not stuck under the bed with those missing socks! 🎁🧦 Maybe I'm chilling in the pantry next to the cookies, or perhaps I've gone incognito as a decorative pillow in the living room. Wherever I am, I'm definitely not making it easy for you to find me! 😉

birthday, daughter, gift, hiding, humor, i, months, parenting, surprise, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

1 month ago
activity, casual, casual activity, food, going, goodbye, guess, humor, i, just, swimming
Water bottle leaking in your bag is a top 10 worst experience.

3 months ago
bag, bottle, experience, inconvenience, leak, leaking, top, water, water bottle, worst, worst experience
Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

1 month ago
back, being, daddy, guys, humor, love, positive, pregnancy, relationship, responsibility, surprise, test
Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

1 month ago
daisy, feelings, grumpy, humor, mood, poetry, red, roses, roses are red, tight, too, underwear, white
One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

4 months ago
daughter, day, family, got, humor, husband, i, know-it-all, parenting, personality, personality traits, Sassy, say, traits, wait
I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

1 month ago
belief, humor, miracle, observation, religion, skepticism, someone, water, wine

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Mike is short for Micycle.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

And is this “year-end bonus” in the room with us right now?

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

Broadcasted on Slack:

The hottest I ever look is when I’m brushing my teeth in my underwear, but it’s very much a ‘tree falls in the woods’ situation.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

Trending via Slack:

What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I only drink when I people.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Going viral on YouTube:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you were the birthday gift I bought my daughter 3 months ago, where would you be hiding?

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Water bottle leaking in your bag is a top 10 worst experience.

Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

I wear black because it’s slimming. Exercise is also slimming, but like I said, I wear black.

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I listen to rock music, my neighbors do too.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

She poured the milk before the cereal. It was not meant to be.

It’s not jingling to you that I’m standing on Christmas.

It’s almost time to put away my black summer clothes and bring out my black fall clothes.

I go to tattoo parlors and trick them into shaving my leg for me, and then leave.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Adulting is only fun when you have the funds.

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Shoutout to myself for ruining my own life.

My cat is so finicky. I finally gave up and taught him how to order Uber Eats for himself.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Chip bags should be clear, show me what you want me to pay $6 for, cowards.

You can’t get a good night’s sleep anymore because of woke.

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

If you were the birthday gift I bought my daughter 3 months ago, where would you be hiding?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Water bottle leaking in your bag is a top 10 worst experience.

Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏