No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Offering people sitting on the bus my standing room. Like it’s better.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

“Bye, have a great day, I’ll see you after school”, I tell the orange in my kid’s lunch.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Has anyone ever considered that Dr. Pepper could be a gynecologist?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

David Attenborough narrating my life: “He’s still sleeping.”

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Turning to the person next to me and saying “thanks for nothing” as I get off the train.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.