Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Raising a teenager is like nailing pudding to the wall – sticky, messy, and you're just left wondering, why did I even attempt this in the first place? 🤪🍮 #ParentingAdventures"

challenge, chaos, humor, parenting, pudding, raising, teenager, wall

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

0

2 months ago

hug, humor, interaction, joke, me, next, punch, reaction, sarcasm, say, social, social interaction, someone, time
I need a leaf blower, but for people.

0

2 months ago

blower, comedy, everyday, everyday life, exaggeration, humor, humorous, humorous quote, i, joke, leaf, life, need, people, relatable, sarcasm, witty
The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first.

0

5 days ago

advice, being, health, humor, ironic, know, mental, mental health, need, person, psychology, put, putting, putting first, right, self-care, therapy, told, worst, Worst Person
I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.

0

2 months ago

alibi, crime, dark, dark humor, friend, friendship, humor, humorist, joke, shovel, shows
People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

0

2 months ago

anything, banana, celebration, costume, event, humor, outfit, own, people, shit, unique, wear
Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

0

2 months ago

adult, age, humor, irony, maturity, me, mistake, people, self-perception

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Threads this month:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

42 shares on YouTube this month:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

64 shares on Instagram this month:

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

46 shares on Reddit this month:

Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

27 shares on Reddit this month:

You should be able to mute someone in real life. Annoying coworker? Silence them for 24 hours by booping them on the nose!

30 shares on Messenger this month:

Millennials are just 30-40-year-olds who look 20-30 years old and feel 80-90 years old.

33 shares on Threads this month:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

24 shares on Slack this month:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

46 shares on Slack this month:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

61 shares on Discord this month:

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Naps are tricky. Either you wake up relaxed and refreshed, or you have a headache, a dry throat and no idea what year it is.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

I love how these vegans still drink water. That’s a fish’s house!

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

What’s a good career for people with no motivation or talent?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Disliking me is valid. I probably confronted you on your poor behavior, while everyone else just accepted it.

Seen just now on Threads:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Shared recently on X:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Dogs are man’s best friend because a dog would never blindside you with a group chat.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

No better feeling than getting home and realizing you forgot the one thing you went out for.

Going viral on Threads:

If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.

Trending via Twitch:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Raising a teenager is like nailing pudding to the wall.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

I need a leaf blower, but for people.

The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first.

I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨