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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

We often come across people in life who make us think: “Oh look, evolution takes a break too!”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Buying something nice for myself, cuz today would’ve been my birthday if I was born today.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m clumsy but there are upsides. For example, if I finish my chips and I’m sad there’s no more chips, I look in my lap and I always find chips.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Sometimes I think the subway rat is doing better than me. He has a routine, a social circle, and knows where to find the best pizza.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,644

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’m disgusted by the amount of nudity on Netflix these days. There’s hardly any. What am I even paying for?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

When you’re over 40 and a part of your body starts hurting for no reason that is nature sending a “what ya doing?” text.

Spotted on WeChat:

They should invent a day where I feel normal.

Breaking via Threads:

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Live now on Twitch:

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

Shared recently on YouTube:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Girls who leave clothing reviews with their height, weight, and size ordered are going to heaven.

Making waves on YouTube:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Broadcasted on TikTok:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

2 months ago

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Commentary:
"Adulting level 9000: Teaching mom how to use emojis without sending a spaceship to Mars! 🚀😂 #RoleReversal #ParentingTheParents"

adulthood, dynamic, family, family dynamic, humor, irony, life, life irony, most, parenting, parents, reversal, role, role reversal, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.

0

2 months ago

caring, city, close-knit, distance, family, happiness, humor, irony, relationships
Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

0

1 month ago

animal, awkward, awkward situation, elephant, funny observation, humor, joke, metaphor, natural, observation, room, situation
Andrew Tate is what you’d get if Axe body spray gained consciousness.

0

5 months ago

andrew, Andrew Tate, Axe, Axe body spray, body, celebrity, consciousness, humor, personification, satire, scent, spray, tate
I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

0

2 months ago

bread, food, friendship, garlic, humor, i, never
I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

0

2 months ago

dating, everyone, expectations, humor, relationship, self-reflection, shortcomings, single
If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

0

4 months ago

able, age, book, childhood, dinner, explaining, humor, kids, little, nostalgia, old, phone, phone book, reach, sit, table, teenager, today, try, used

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on Threads this month:

I love how my brain is like, “We’re not going to think about that,” and then thinks about only that.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

53 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

98 shares on Discord this month:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

95 shares on X this month:

I am like a wildflower, a quiet rebellion blooming through ruins and dust.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

My first thought upon waking up in the morning is “not again”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

On my phone, you’ll never see contacts saved as ‘babe’ or ‘love.’ I save full names—first and last—like a government office.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Everyone is getting idioter.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

The Sims fulfills the millennial fantasy of being able to afford a house in a walkable neighborhood on the salary of a professional carrot peeler.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be getting stronger every day.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Hit the vape till it tastes like technology.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

I regret to inform you that the secret to appearing well-read is to read.

Making waves on Twitch:

If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

Live now on Messenger:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Trending via Threads:

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Breaking via Reddit:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Just shared via TikTok:

I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

Just landed via Discord:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Going viral on Telegram:

I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.

Andrew Tate is what you’d get if Axe body spray gained consciousness.

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨