Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Men only have money the first month of dating, that’s recruitment budget, never confuse it with operational budget.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Can I come over and figure you out?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Just found out it don’t matter how early I go to bed, I just don’t wanna go to work.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,488

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Call your family now and ask them what the wifi password is, so they have time to find the little paper it’s written on before Thanksgiving.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Trending via Telegram:

Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

Making waves on Discord:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Trending via Telegram:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Seen just now on Slack:

No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

Shared recently on X:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

“Your boos mean nothing to me. I’ve seen what you cheer.” Is a goated doctrine. If Rick and Morty gave us anything, it gave us that.

Just shared via Facebook:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

3 weeks ago

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Why is it that ducklings can master swimming on their first day, while I'm still trying to figure out my washing machine? 🐥🌀

15, animal, animals, humor, instinct, know, life, life skill, minutes, newborn, old, skill

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Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Telegram this month:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

44 shares on Instagram this month:

Becoming an adult was the worst thing I’ve ever done.

65 shares on Discord this month:

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I can’t believe someone ran over my neighbors loud motorcycle tomorrow morning.

85 shares on Discord this month:

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m not drinking 2% milk until we figure out what the other 98% is.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

There is no reason to be a people pleaser. People are never pleased.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The greatest allies fascism and genocide have are the people who say, “I don’t follow the news, it’s too depressing.”

19 shares on Discord this month:

I wish I was as tired at bedtime as I am at 2 p.m. on any given day.

99 shares on WeChat this month:

May he drop his phone on his face while he’s texting other girls.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

Hey (with the intention of going to sleep).

Seen just now on Reddit:

It was all revealed to me in a delusion.

Freshly posted on X:

No more ragebaiting around me, please. Let’s try joybaiting, perhaps even lovebaiting.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Forget a dinner date, let’s go sit in court listening to people’s cases.

Just landed via WeChat:

Japanese Latina catgirl be like ña.

Going viral on Instagram:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

Seen just now on Discord:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Seen just now on Twitch:

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

Spotted on Slack:

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Hot girl in her 20s: It’s so weird, but I keep getting lucky, and everything works out in my favor.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

I ordered a new umbrella on Amazon and had it delivered straight to the lost and found office to maximize efficiency.

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

My husband loves when we fight, and I turn it into a limited series called And Another Thing.

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I ordered a new umbrella on Amazon and had it delivered straight to the lost and found office to maximize efficiency.

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Yeah, bro, she’s probably just not using her phone right now, for the first time ever in her whole life.

Yeah, Instagram is bad for our mental health, but what about Outlook?

My husband loves when we fight, and I turn it into a limited series called And Another Thing.

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨