Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

When the weather gets warmer, I will become unstoppable. As long as it doesn’t get too warm, then I will be stoppable.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

I have money, then I don’t have money, it all happens so fast!

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I bet my calculator app wrapped would be pretty shameful.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

The book characters may be fictional, but my emotional instability over them is real.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,664

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.

154 Funny adult quotes

More funny adult quotes 👇

I was dropped as an adult.

3 weeks ago

adult, drop, dropped, humor, i, joke, self-deprecation
Never go to bed angry. Stay up and finish the argument like an adult.

3 weeks ago

adult, angry, argument, bed, conflict, finish, humor, never, relationship, stay, staying, staying up
I don’t know why doctors only give stickers to kids? Like, hello, I was also brave today.

3 weeks ago

adult, brave, doctor, doctors, give, hello, humor, i, kid, kids, know, only, recognition, reward, sticker, today
Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

3 weeks ago

adult, adulting, appreciate, being, choices, headspace, humor, i, job, just, life, life choices, opportunity, position, responsibility, right, stepping, stepping down, thinking
When you’re a child, you want to be a teenager. When you’re a teenager, you want to be an adult. When you’re an adult, you want to be a cat.

3 weeks ago

adult, adulthood, cat, child, desire, expectations, humor, irony, life, life stages, stages, teenager, want
As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

3 weeks ago

adult, drinking, friends, humor, nostalgia, park, secret, squirrels, teen, transition
Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

3 weeks ago

adult, baby, brat, corner, dancing, dirty, Dirty Dancing, girl, humor, lesson, movie, needs, nostalgia, right, teenager, watching
Adults should not be twins. Being twins is for children.

3 weeks ago

adult, adults, being, children, funny statement, humor, should, statement, twin, twins
After being raised on Disney movies, I’m very disappointed how few adult problems can be solved by a good song and dance.

3 weeks ago

adult, adult problems, after, being, childhood, dance, disappointment, Disney, good, humor, movy, problems, raised, song
People often mistake me for an adult because of my age.

3 weeks ago

adult, age, humor, irony, me, mistake, people, perception

For even more funny adult quotes, hit next 👇

All funny adult quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If your wife uses “I” it means she will be doing something. “We” means you will be.

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Kids are like pancakes. The first one is always a bit strange.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

99 shares on Telegram this month:

Swimming is so embarrassing, everyone can see you want to be alive.

64 shares on Instagram this month:

Nobody at this train station knows that there’s a hole in my sock.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

Human hibernation should be a thing.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

Silicon Valley has taken over the world. Remember when nerds had the good manners to be ashamed of themselves?

96 shares on Discord this month:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

72 shares on Telegram this month:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

This gratitude journal looks a lot like a grocery list.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Just paid my rent, now I have a warm place to starve in.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

The phone is the most evil screen. The computer is somewhat evil, but less so than the phone. The TV is benevolent.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I really hope that I look like the mirror version of me, and not the camera version.

Going viral on Slack:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

Making waves on Slack:

Today, I want to talk about how people’s houses smell funny, but mine doesn’t.

Seen just now on Threads:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Shared recently on Slack:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I avoid clarified butter because I prefer my dairy products to be troubled and confused.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Shared recently on Messenger:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Spotted on Twitch:

The more I practice, the luckier I get.

Activity Log ✨

154 Funny adult quotes

More funny adult quotes 👇

All funny adult quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨