Commentary:
That kid thinking about the good old days of nap time and snack breaks 😂🍪🍼
197 Funny childhood quotes
Today’s kids don’t even get chicken pox anymore, they go straight to STDs.
Commentary:
Wow, kids these days are achieving things much faster 😅🍗➡️🚑
Kids these days are soft. I’m pretty sure I died once when I was 7, and my mom made me walk it off.
Commentary:
When I was 7, walking it off was considered a life-saving procedure 😂👍 #ResilienceSkills
I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.
Commentary:
Still trying to tip the scales with good deeds so that cow doesn't come back in my next life 🐄✌️😅
In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.
Commentary:
Digging out those old Pokémon cards like they're stocks I should have invested in 😂📈 #WisdomOfTheYouth
As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.
Commentary:
I know, right? My "Strangers Offering Free Drugs" punch card is still completely blank! 😅🍬🚫
What no one ever considers is that the kids are pretending to believe in Santa for the sake of the parents.
Commentary:
This explains why the kids keep dropping hints that Santa needs a GPS upgrade! 🎅🗺️😄
Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.
Commentary:
Sounds like a delicious plan for a mid-life crisis retreat 🍔🍟🌳 Might come back looking like a legendary forest creature! 🧙♂️🍔🌲
Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.
Commentary:
Beam me up! My neighbors are still Earthlings 😂🚀✨
As a kid, I didn’t understand the subtext of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’ at all. I thought Mommy was cheating.
Commentary:
Looks like the North Pole needs a relationship counselor! 🎅💋🤣