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81 Funny end quotes

Trending Funny End Quotes 🔥

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.
I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.
At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.
I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.
Watching Unsolved Mysteries and getting mad when they don’t solve the mystery at the end.

More funny end quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I already know how it will end. One of my children will unplug my life support to charge their phone.

Commentary:
"Looks like it's not just the Wi-Fi that's getting disconnected, but grandma too! 📱💀 #FamilyPriorities"
5 months ago
Share →: You spend so long trying to think of a name for your cat only to end up calling them “for god’s sake” and “please stop”.

Commentary:
"Isn't it just purr-fect how our feline friends always end up with the sassiest nicknames? 🐱😹 It's a meow-tastrophe waiting to happen! Who knew 'For God's Sake' and 'Please Stop' could be such popular choices among our whiskered companions? Perhaps they're just feline misunderstood! 😸"
5 months ago
Share →: I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

Commentary:
Looks like winter is coming in full force! 🌨️❄️ Who needs the Night's Watch when you have the municipal snow plow guarding your driveway like the Wall from Game of Thrones? Just make sure you don't encounter any White Walkers on your way to work! ⚔️ #WinterIsHere
5 months ago
Share →: At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Commentary:
Well, they do say, "Doctor knows best!" 🩺💉 Looks like this doctor decided to make sure she's in tip-top shape too. Talk about practicing what you preach! 🩸😄
5 months ago
Share →: Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Commentary:
🤯 "Defending your Ph.D. is like the academic equivalent of a championship fight – except no one warned you that you'd have to battle a committee of professors instead of stepping into a ring! Who knew academia could be so cutthroat? 😂 Just remember, you've got this – stand tall, maintain your sanity, and show 'em who's boss!"
5 months ago
Share →: I’m only here while I wait for that Nigerian prince to follow through on his end of the bargain.
5 months ago
Share →: Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Commentary:
Looks like Bob was ready to dive into those tortillas with gusto! 🌮😄 Who needs convenience when you have Bob's innovative tearing skills? Maybe he should start a tortilla bag opening masterclass! 🎉
5 months ago
Share →: On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Commentary:
"Looks like we've come a long way from the 'good ol' days' when folks needed a giant 'The End' sign to figure out the movie was finished 🤣📽️ It's a relief to know we're evolving… one cinema experience at a time!"
5 months ago
Share →: Just once I wanna slide down a dinosaur at the end of my workday, is that too much to ask for?

Commentary:
"Who needs a boring old slide when you can have a dinosaur ride to wrap up the day?! 🦕 Just imagine the looks on your coworkers' faces as you cruise past them in style! Definitely an epic way to end the workday, for sure! 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Commentary:
"In life, sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel turns out to be the headlight of an oncoming train 🚂💥. Talk about a plot twist! Remember, look both ways before crossing those metaphorical tracks! 😁"