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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Need to win the lottery so I can focus on going to museums and working out.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

My taste in music ranges from “You’ve gotta listen to this” to “I know, please don’t judge me.”

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

What bootlickers fail to understand is that the boot eventually comes for them too.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Every year, just in time for Christmas, when it’s freezing cold, the Coca Cola truck shows up. Now, in this freaking heat, it’s nowhere to be seen.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,831

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Going viral on WeChat:

The first thing you need to know about social media is that everyone’s on vacation, except for you.

Spotted on Twitch:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I like my music at a volume where I can’t hear you.

Spotted on Messenger:

Super excited about a brand new week of questioning all my life choices.

Just landed via Threads:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

Shared recently on Facebook:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Trending via Reddit:

Imagining how cathartic it must feel to send forth thousands and thousands of bats from your Transylvanian manor.

Just shared via Twitch:

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

Going viral on Slack:

Me, after skipping the tutorial: how the hell do you play this game?

Home » Funny Fix Quotes

33 Funny fix quotes

Funny fix quotes are the perfect blend of humor and wisdom to brighten your day 🔧😂 Whether you’re tackling a tricky problem or just need a chuckle while fixing life’s little glitches, these witty lines will keep you smiling 😄✨ Ready to laugh through the mess and turn every oops into a LOL? Let’s dive into some clever, playful vibes that make fixing things way more fun! 🤪💡

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All funny fix quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Messenger this month:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

32 shares on Slack this month:

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.

99 shares on Pinterest this month:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

Being in love will have you put your pride aside and go to places you never thought you would, like New Jersey.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

85 shares on X this month:

Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up; we had to manually roll up our cars’ windows.

58 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss you (the money I spent).

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I may be a chaotic mess, but then so is quantum physics.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My running speed is very slow because the Discman wasn’t allowed to shake in the past.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

There is no physiological reason to yell when you sneeze. People who do that are simply weak and rude.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you’ve been single for a long time, you realize how exhausting relationships can be.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,667

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Babe, what’s wrong? You’ve barely tweeted your manic thoughts today.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

There is still plenty of room in my heart, but the bouncer has become a little stricter in recent years.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

Just landed via Threads:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

Going bananas on Discord:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Making waves on WeChat:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Making waves on WeChat:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Trending via Pinterest:

And is this “year-end bonus” in the room with us right now?

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I used to have a great future in my past.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If the Beatles were just 4 lads from Liverpool, imagine what 400 lads from Liverpool would sound like. But y’all aren’t ready for that conversation.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

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