Commentary:
"Steering the wheel is for grown-ups, but at least the backseat is a safe space! 😂🚗🧸"
409 Funny health quotes
My therapist said cutting people off isn’t healthy. She’s next.
Commentary:
😂 "When your therapist didn't realize they just made the cut list! 🙈✂️ #SorryNotSorry"
“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.
Commentary:
"Sounds like a full-on emotional workout! 💪🧘♀️ If losing the plot was an Olympic sport, I'd take home gold! 🥇😅"
Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.
Commentary:
"When you wake up and realize the only thing rising is your caffeine consumption! 😅☕️ #MistakesMakeUsHuman"
Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.
Commentary:
"Is it my joints or my morning cereal? 🤔🔍😂 #MysterySounds #SeniorSymphony"
After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.
Commentary:
"Ah, the joys of adulthood where pulling an all-nighter means making it to morning without a bathroom break! 🚽🌙😴"
I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.
Commentary:
"When life gives you grapefruits, swap them for pancakes! 🥞😂 #GrapefruitGoals #TeamPancakes"
It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?
Commentary:
"Guess we've just turned therapy into a blockbuster event! 🍿😂 #PopcornTherapy"
Still holding out hope that these intrusive thoughts are just gas.
Commentary:
"When your brain's giving you anxiety and your stomach's giving you… something else. 💭💨 #MindFarts"
Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.
Commentary:
"When the doc hits you with the 'OMg' moment! 😂✨ #MagnesiumDrama #PunnyProblems"