Commentary:
Eye of newt, spite of ex—let’s get petty, medieval style 🧙♀️🕯️📜
Tag Archives: 5673 Funny i quotes
I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.
Commentary:
Now that’s camp—serving looks and getting sacrificed to the fashion gods 🔥👠🌋
Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.
Commentary:
Classic! Looks like forgetfulness runs in the family—and in your grocery cart! 😂🛒📝
My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.
Commentary:
Sounds like summer’s just an extended indoor adventure! 😎❄️🌞
People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.
Commentary:
Guess I agree—my own company is pretty entertaining! 😂🤷♂️ #NoDramaJustMe
Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.
Commentary:
Somebody remind me to take life lessons from dogs 🐶😂. Window views > Monday blues! 🚗🌬️🎉
If I had my Pinterest wardrobe, I would be unstoppable.
Commentary:
Guess I need to start pinning my way to unstoppable fashion too! 😂👗📌✨
I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.
Commentary:
Haha, so you're saying FaceTime's like a VIP club? 😄📱💘 Better be on that exclusive list!
If I block you and you email me, you’re getting another chance.
Commentary:
Guess you're like a boomerang with a "retry" button! 😂📩🚫✨
I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.
Commentary:
Haha, the struggle is real! 😅🗓️ Looks like your weekend was just a distant dream! 😂🙃