Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Did 900 crunches today. It was a bag of Cheetos, but still.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

My problem is, I wanna be the only one at the gym when I go.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I am officially at the age where old people think I am young and young people think I am old.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Not now, babe, it’s my nightly phone enrichment time.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,579

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Spotted on Discord:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Trending via Snapchat:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

Just shared via Reddit:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Making waves on Instagram:

Facebook friends are like pens. You may have 150, but only 5 are writing.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Here’s what I’ve learned since I’ve been on social media: I’m not nearly as disturbed as I thought I was.

Live now on Facebook:

Turtles made out of plastic, problem solved.

Funny instrument quotes

Funny instrument quotes bring a smile to every music lover’s face 🎶😄 Whether you’re a seasoned player or just love a good laugh, these witty sayings hit all the right notes 🎸🎺 From clever puns to hilarious truths, get ready to tune into some serious fun and share the joy of making music with a twist 🎤😂 Let the good vibes and giggles begin!

New funny instrument quotes 👇

All funny instrument quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Maybe the wolf from The Neverending Story still has nightmares about me, too.

66 shares on X this month:

Resting bitch face saves me from so many conversations I don’t want to be part of.

63 shares on X this month:

I swear every time I look up from my phone, it’s a different holiday.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

There are two types of people at work: Those who work and those who have become pros at looking busy.

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.

94 shares on Snapchat this month:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

15 shares on Discord this month:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

19 shares on Snapchat this month:

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

I’d rather throw everything I own in the trash than try to deal with people on Facebook Marketplace.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Through pottery, we domesticated rocks.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Dissecting an alien and getting bitterly jealous at their crazy organs.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Ironic that the two ơ’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope the next time you’re stressed, it’s because you’re choosing between Japan, Bali, Switzerland, or the Maldives.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course, because I’m wearing a white shirt, my coffee chose violence.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,505

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

You get to choose which path you take. I see some of you have chosen the psychopath.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

Seen just now on Reddit:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Live now on Facebook:

Some of these fake tans look like an old Tupperware container that’s had marinara sauce in it.

Shared recently on Threads:

The sexual tension between me and the alternate reality I daydream about.

Making waves on WeChat:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

Just landed via Instagram:

Nobody could stop me if I wasn’t tired all the time.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Carrots are a great thing to eat when you’re hungry, and want to stay that way.

Seen just now on X:

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

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