Funny retrograde quotes

• My bank account is also in retrograde.

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  2 months ago

  account, astrology, bank, bank account, finance, humor, joke, money, retrograde

• Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

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  2 months ago

  ask, astrology, being, ever, feelings, humor, Mercury, only, perspective, reflection, retrograde, self-centered, stop, think, yourself

• Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

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  2 months ago

  absurdity, cow, humor, longer, Mercury, never, retrograde, sun, swim, trust

• I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

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  2 months ago

  again, astrology, bad, bad things, blame, fact, grown, grown up, humor, i, just, me, Mercury, parents, problems, retrograde, self-awareness, terms, things, used

• Mercury retrograde: because adulting is hard, and sometimes you just need a celestial excuse.

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  5 months ago

  adulting, celestial, excuse, hard, humor, just, Mercury, Mercury retrograde, need, retrograde, sometimes

• Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

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  6 months ago

  actually, astrology, demon, frustration, humor, Mercury, Mercury retrograde, midnight, retrograde, soul, wrap

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