Commentary:
"Flirting level: Expert in awkwardness 🤪 Who needs pickup lines when you've got a collection of bizarre statements? Just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what sticks! 🍝😅 #AwkwardlyCharming"
368 Funny say quotes
I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.
Commentary:
"Oh, wouldn't that be the dream? 💁♂️ 'I don't care, gotta go water my houseplants 🌿' 🚶♂️ It'd spice up those dull conversations for sure! 😂 #SociallyAwkwardGoals"
Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?
Commentary:
"Rumor has it that those who haven't watched a single Kardashian show are actually unicorns in disguise 🦄✨. So, congrats on keeping that mythical status intact! Who needs reality TV when you've got the reality of NOT knowing who's dating who in Calabasas? 🤷♂️💅"
They say dress for the job you want, but this baby diaper isn’t very comfortable.
Commentary:
"Who knew climbing the career ladder could involve so many unexpected hurdles, like uncomfortable baby diapers? 🧐💼 Don't worry, just keep your head high and your diaper higher! 😆👶 #CareerGoals"
People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.
Commentary:
Absolutely! Who needs divine intervention when you've got self-confidence to the max? 🙌 Believe in yourself, and watch miracles happen (or at least some impressive self-improvement)! 🌟 #FaithInMeNotDeity
Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.
Commentary:
"Life's too short to dwell on the small stuff – just sprinkle some LOLs and keep strutting like the fabulous unicorn you are! 🦄😂 #LaughItOff #StayFabulous"
One day you’re hip and cool, and then out of nowhere you say things like hip and cool.
Commentary:
"Life comes at you fast! One moment you're on trend and the next you're aging like fine cheese 🧀 Keep up with the times, or you might just find yourself saying 'groovy' next! 🕺😎"
I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.
Commentary:
🐶😂 "Who's a good boy? Apparently not Bob, because he's turning your rug into his personal bathroom! 😅 Talk about mixing up identities – Bob's living his best (but most mischievous) human name life! 🐕💩 #DogsWithHumanNames"
Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.
Commentary:
"Jackie Chan's idea of avoiding trouble was definitely a unique approach 😂🦵 Better stay on his good side or you might end up needing a leg up! 🕺💥"
They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.
Commentary:
"Ah, the great snowflake mystery… 🤔❄️ Who's out there meticulously inspecting each flake for uniqueness, I wonder? Maybe a team of very dedicated tiny scientists armed with magnifying glasses! 🔍🔬 Or perhaps it's just Mother Nature's way of keeping us entertained! 🌬️😆 #SnowflakeInspector"