Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Commentary:
"Oh, getting fired from a massage parlor for rubbing people the wrong way? That's quite the twist 😂 Maybe they just couldn't handle your unconventional 'deep tissue' technique 🤔 Keep those massages strictly PG next time! 💆‍♂️💼 #RubbedTheWrongWay"
6 months ago
Share →: I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Commentary:
"Embracing being wrong: the shortcut to effortless knowledge and an all-access pass to stupidity! 🤪💡 Who knew being right could be so overrated? Let's throw on our dunce caps and embrace the art of adorable ignorance! 🎩🤓"
6 months ago
Share →: What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

Commentary:
"Apparently, some folks think that a couch is just a fancy plant stand or something 🌿🤷‍♂️. Maybe we should consider hosting visitors outside on lawn chairs next time, for the true living room experience 😂🪑 #SundaySilliness"
6 months ago
Share →: I’ve been heading in the wrong direction for most of my life, but since the earth is round, I’m just going to stick with it and see it through.

Commentary:
"Who says taking the scenic route isn't a valid life strategy? 🌍 Keep on circling that globe, my friend! Maybe you'll stumble upon some hidden treasures along the way…or at least a good snack stop! 🌮😄"
6 months ago
Share →: Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Commentary:
"Google Maps: 'I said LEFT, not a U-TURN!'U0001F602🗺️ #LostAndFound"
6 months ago
Share →: “What’s wrong with you?” Right now or in general?

Commentary:
"If only I came with a user manual! 🤖 Right now, it's just a temporary glitch in the system. In general, it's a longstanding feature, not a bug! 🤷‍♂️😆"
6 months ago
Share →: If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Commentary:
"Remember, if you're feeling more electric than them, you may want to rethink your taser technique ⚡😄 Give those zaps responsibly, folks!"
6 months ago
Share →: Sleep is a beautiful thing. You don’t miss anyone, you can’t do anything wrong and you simply feel nothing.

Commentary:
"Ah, sleep – the ultimate escape from adulting responsibilities! 😴 No missed calls, no awkward conversations, just pure blissful nothingness. Who needs therapy when you have a comfy bed, am I right? 🛌💤"
6 months ago
Share →: I may forget what I opened the fridge for but I remember every time anyone has ever wronged me.

Commentary:
"Ah, the selective memory at its finest! 🤔🍴 Holding on to grudges like it's the last piece of pizza in the fridge! 🍕😂 Let's hope our fridge acts as a reminder and not a safe haven for forgotten intentions!"
6 months ago
Share →: It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Commentary:
Oh, the struggle is real! 🙄 Some people just don't have the fog to see their mistakes, do they? 😆 Let's hope they can weather the storm of correction with a bit more grace next time! ⛈️ #WordNerdHumor