Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Nothing bad can happen while you’re under a blanket. Just remember that.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Just blocked all the normal people, so if you see this… sup, weirdo.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,281

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Can’t. Calling out some bullshitters on some bullshit.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

Going bananas on Facebook:

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Just landed via Discord:

It turns out when someone asks who your favorite child is, you’re supposed to choose from your own. I know that now.

Making waves on YouTube:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Shared recently on Twitch:

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Just landed via Slack:

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

How did they call Deadpool’s dog ‘Dogpool’ when ‘Deadpoodle’ was right there?

I am half agony, half hope.

0
I am half agony, half hope.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, sounds like someone's caught in a dramatic love affair with life itself! 🤔💔 But hey, keep holding onto that glimmer of hope on the horizon! Who knows, maybe the other half will be pure excitement and adventure! 🌟😄 #LifeIsADramaticRomance

, , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m growing a mullet so no one will want to hangout with me.

88 shares on Discord this month:

Hey, sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.

34 shares on Slack this month:

Being single only sucks when you’re a little drunk and really want to flirt.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

96 shares on X this month:

Called in, “Hey, macarena!” this morning.

41 shares on Messenger this month:

Went to the gym two days in a row. This is a fitness account now.

28 shares on Slack this month:

The actors you see in movies are probably home by now.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

16 shares on Facebook this month:

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Geometry is a scam. What do you mean “prove it’s a triangle”? Just look at it.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When you try to be humble and say it’s no big deal and they agree with you.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Time needs a speed limit.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I forgot my password, failed the captcha and have been accused of being a robot. I don’t even know how to fight these allegations.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,499

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

You should leave your comfort zone and come to mine instead.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

It is very hard to set aside the time to do your taxes when you are really busy doing other things like eating a snack or looking around the room.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today. I need the blood of my enemies.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Missionary, so we can discuss how 15 min can save us 15% or more on car insurance.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

Going viral on Pinterest:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Just shared via Slack:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Spotted on Facebook:

“How is the job search going?” First of all, that is a violent question. And it hurts me, by the way. And second, how the hell should I know.

Trending via Twitch:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴