Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

It sucks that the reward for being responsible, is just a bunch of new responsibilities.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Skinny people are easier to get blown around by storms. These donuts are for my safety.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

To all the people with grammatical issues, don’t worry, I also have problems with badly timed periods.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Working your entire life so you can ‘enjoy’ a couple of years when you’re close to death is the biggest scam of all time.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

A moment of silence for the paycheck that was in my account for five minutes.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

You wake up at 6 a.m. and it’s like you have 48 hours instead of 24.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Do you ever stress about money, then accidentally order from Amazon?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Nicole Kidman being in a film called Babygirl is actually perfect cause it’s like another version of her last name.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Going viral on Messenger:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

Going viral on Instagram:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Making waves on TikTok:

I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.

Going bananas on Threads:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Going viral on Reddit:

I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast, it had to be done by Elvis.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Not arguing with a man that can cook. Whatever you say, handsome.

Just shared via Telegram:

Golf would be more exciting to watch if they played naked.

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Weekends should come with a "Do Not Disturb" sign for humans 🛑😴 #ThingFreeZone

activity, doing, doing things, exhaustion, humor, i, just, next, people, procrastination, relaxation, sarcasm, things, understand, week, weekend, workweek

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

0

2 months ago

appearance, clothing, confusion, disguise, dressed, easily, grandmother, guy, humor, i, irony, me, sheep, spot, wolf
Gang initiations from the Midwest be like “you have to eat the entire potato salad.”

0

2 months ago

challenge, eat, food, food challenge, gang, gang initiation, humor, initiation, Midwest, potato, potato salad, regional, regional stereotype, salad, stereotype
You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

0

5 months ago

clueless, confuse, confusion, going, humor, i, know, me, misunderstanding
Why is everything 10x better at night? Driving, showering, eating, vibing to music, watching Netflix… phone calls. Like, everything.

0

2 months ago

better, call, calls, driving, eating, entertainment, everything, music, Netflix, night, phone, phone call, shower, vibe, watching, why
I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

0

2 months ago

after, before, comedy, honesty, humor, i, impulsiveness, late, late night, life, night, personality, reflection, regret, rest, said, say, self-awareness, speech, think
Another customer getting a haircut started talking to my barber. Please don’t talk to my barber. You have your own.

0

4 weeks ago

another, barber, conversation, customer, etiquette, getting, haircut, humor, own, please, social, social etiquette, started, talk, talking

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

69 shares on Slack this month:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

14 shares on Pinterest this month:

Therapy isn’t enough, she needs to know people congratulated me when we broke up.

49 shares on X this month:

The only guarantee in life is, if you run errands looking like shit, you will run into everyone you haven’t seen in months.

70 shares on Twitch this month:

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid.

87 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Back to work at last! I couldn’t sleep for sheer anticipation.

12 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

43 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

85 shares on Facebook this month:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Shouldn’t it have been called the ‘not answering machine’?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I just want someone to miss me the way my 3 year old nephew misses me when I go to the washroom.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Going viral on YouTube:

Please don’t ask me to repeat myself. I wasn’t listening either.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Spotted on Reddit:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Trending via Slack:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Seen just now on WeChat:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Live now on Slack:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Making waves on X:

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Trending via TikTok:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

Shared recently on X:

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

Gang initiations from the Midwest be like “you have to eat the entire potato salad.”

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

Why is everything 10x better at night? Driving, showering, eating, vibing to music, watching Netflix… phone calls. Like, everything.

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Another customer getting a haircut started talking to my barber. Please don’t talk to my barber. You have your own.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨