Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Sorry I’m late. Had to scroll back to my birth year.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Not commenting on your girl’s stuff is weird. I want my man barking in my comments.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Everyone focused on the lip filler, but it’s really the chin filler that is the real villain.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,252

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

Flirting is easy until you have to flirt with the person you like.

Freshly posted on X:

Never underestimate the healing power of a cheeseburger.

Just landed via Twitch:

Looks fade but dark, twisted, inappropriate humor is forever.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I don’t make mistakes, I date them.

Trending via Reddit:

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

A large group of people is called an “eww, no thank you”

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Just landed via Twitch:

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sleeping away the sadness like a pro 😴💤 #HackLife

asleep, hack, happiness, health, humor, life, life hack, mental, mental health, mood, positivity, relaxation, sad, sleep

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

0

2 months ago

every, food, humor, i, indulgence, lifetime, pasta, penne, savings, spend, supply, think, worth
Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

0

2 months ago

Dick, dislike, guy, humor, joke, name, nickname, Richard, wordplay
Acceptance truly begins when you ask Alexa to play classic rock and she plays a song that came out when you were in high school.

0

2 months ago

acceptance, age, Alexa, ask, came, classic, classic rock, high, high school, humor, music, nostalgia, play, rock, school, song, technology, truly
Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

0

2 months ago

ambulance, doctors, health, hope, hospital, humor, i, irony, okay, seen
My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

0

2 months ago

am, bed, humor, i, morning, procrastination, routine, self-reflection, thinking, tired
My fridge has brought more light into my life than most people.

0

2 months ago

appliance, fridge, happiness, humor, life, light, most, people, relationship

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

66 shares on Threads this month:

The downside of common sense is, having to deal with those that lack it.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

27 shares on X this month:

When life gives you lemons maybe think to yourself, “that’s really quite remarkable given how far I live from a climate capable of growing citrus.”

56 shares on Reddit this month:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

13 shares on Telegram this month:

You know you’re really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves.

31 shares on Facebook this month:

“It’s bikini season,” I whisper, eating another bikini.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Have I made bad decisions when I was drunk? Sure. But have the sober ones been any better? Not really.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

You stop moving your mouse for 5 seconds, and Microsoft Teams will say you never showed up for work.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Banks should have a gold bar that you can go in and touch when you feel poor.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Like, who are those little paper umbrellas trying to protect?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Nowadays you don’t even have to go to the zoo. A trip to the mall is enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Just landed via Threads:

I’m a comedian. My pronouns are ha/ha.

Trending via Facebook:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

They’re called grown-ups because they groan every time they get up.

Seen just now on Messenger:

It was the worst of times, it was the worst of times.

Shared recently on Threads:

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncé was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

Spotted on X:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Diarrhea. Having it. Spelling it. Everything about it is shit.

Shared recently on Facebook:

“Do something with your life.” Um, I am. Have you heard of a little thing called squandering?

Making waves on Reddit:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Acceptance truly begins when you ask Alexa to play classic rock and she plays a song that came out when you were in high school.

Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

My fridge has brought more light into my life than most people.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨