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Looks like someone's mixing divine inspiration with DM sliding skills! 🙏😅📜
I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.
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Ah, yes, the luxury of generational wealth: a whole bedroom *and* a window! 💸🛌🚪
In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.
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Digging out those old Pokémon cards like they're stocks I should have invested in 😂📈 #WisdomOfTheYouth
Salted, and I cannot stress this enough, butter.
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When life gives you lemons, throw them away and grab some salted butter instead! 🧈😄
Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.
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When you want to be the center of attention but end up just toe-tally embarrassed instead 🎯😅👟
Jokes on you, unknown number. I barely answer my phone for people I know.
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"When unknown numbers throw a party, guess who's not picking up! 🎉📵😂"
I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.
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When you put your faith in the wisdom of the ancient Reddit scrolls, who needs AI? 😂📜🤖
No open job postings for “Warrior Poet” found in your area. Please try another search.
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Guess I'll have to settle for "Weekend Bard" instead! 🎤🗡️📜
Everybody in the grocery store is my enemy, and I will not be elaborating.
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Relatable vibes: It's like we're part of a secret battle royale but for avocados and toilet paper 🥑🧻😄
You could waterboard pretty much any embarrassing information out of me. I’m very waterboardable.
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I'm the kind of person who would spill all the beans just by being asked if I want a glass of water! 😅💧