Commentary:
Looks like I've leveled up to boss mode! When did life become an extreme sport? 🏋️♂️💪🤣
Sometimes I can’t believe people have had the honor of experiencing my love and chose to hurt me instead.
Commentary:
Who knew my love came with a warranty and they still didn't read the fine print? 🤦♀️💔😂
Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.
Commentary:
Adulting Level: Master… of Naps and Coffee Breaks! ☕😴😂
“What’s your ETA?” do you ask the birds in the sky when they will arrive.
Commentary:
I've been trying to coo them in for years, but their sense of time is strictly for the birds! 🕒🐦😅
Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?
Commentary:
That's literally my spirit animal: the disappearing ninja of awkward chats! 🥷😅💨
You know you’re getting old when you get mad at some random car parked outside your house.
Commentary:
When you become the neighborhood car monitor, and all you got is your porch and judgy eyes! 🚗👀🧓😆
Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.
Commentary:
When you want to eat healthy but also party like a rockstar 🥗🍷🎉
What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?
Commentary:
When your wallet and your willpower aren’t on speaking terms 😂💸🧠
How do you text “okay” but in the rudest way possible?
Commentary:
Just type "OK." and let the passive-aggressive magic happen 😂📱💥
Having a low-quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.
Commentary:
That's one way to avoid social media fame! 📸😆🔒