Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

They should invent a life where I know what I’m doing.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Reincarnation, in this economy?

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,300

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

I love to watch the enthusiasm of new coworkers, and then their inevitable slow descent into not giving a damn.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

Making waves on YouTube:

You wish you had this many chins.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I hope this email kills us both.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I need new friends. The old ones know too much.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Just shared via X:

We need a word for a type of person who spends all their time working to live in a city so they can be near cool things, but they don’t actually like going out.

Shared recently on Discord:

Girls will be like, “This is my comfort song,” and it’s the howling of a wolf inside a dark forest.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I don’t fight my demons anymore. We collaborate.

Spotted on WeChat:

Life’s too short to remove the USB drive safely.

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"The 'E' in my name stands for 'Everything you need.' 🌟 So basically, I'm your one-stop shop for awesomeness! 💁‍♂️💼 #AllHailE"

E, everything, humor, identity, joke, name, need, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

0

2 months ago

activity, amazing, big, eating, fast, fast food, fat, food, fun, fun activity, getting, humor, i, indulgence, love, overweight, self-deprecating
“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

0

2 months ago

cousin, cruelty, even, evolution, fate, humor, internet, internet slang, language, lmao, over, rofl, slang, survival
Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

0

2 months ago

30, beating, break, came, frustration, humor, lunch, management, minute, needs, time, time management, workplace
Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

0

2 months ago

call, calls, cell, cell phone, communication, honesty, humor, i, ignored, ignored call, missed, missed call, phone, six, tell, truth
Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

0

2 months ago

animal, beaver, comedy, doing, engineering, humor, hydraulic, hydraulic engineering, little, rat
My mom gave me a coffee mug that says “Be your own kind of beautiful” and I’m really trying not to read too much into that.

0

2 months ago

beautiful, coffee, coffee mug, gift, humor, interpretation, me, mom, much, mug, own, read, sarcasm, self-acceptance, too, trying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Discord this month:

For a girl that loves sleep and hates stress, my career choice is questionable.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

61 shares on Threads this month:

I like to put “No DMs” in my bio to pretend that I’m attractive.

92 shares on X this month:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

28 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

77 shares on YouTube this month:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

54 shares on WeChat this month:

God, please, for once in my life, let me get what I want.

74 shares on Discord this month:

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

55 shares on Threads this month:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit. So proud of myself. It was a scarf, but still, let’s be positive here.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Very disappointed by the symbolism of last night’s dream. Just really obvious, derivative stuff.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Which is it, brain? Does nothing matter or do I need to be anxious about everything?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Snow White and the seven dwarves of the menopause; Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful, and Psycho.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Just landed via Telegram:

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

Spotted on WeChat:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

Trending via TikTok:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Just landed via Threads:

My soulmate is probably out there, wondering if there’s life on earth.

Just shared via Facebook:

Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

Trending via TikTok:

I’m trying to cut back on how much sense I make.

Going viral on Instagram:

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Introverts have fun, too — we just don’t care if you know.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, Guantanamo Bay.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

My mom gave me a coffee mug that says “Be your own kind of beautiful” and I’m really trying not to read too much into that.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨