Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Once you realize that the general public is retarded, you stop caring about how crazy you look to them.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Am I the only one who prays about everything? Like, ‘God, please help me find where I dropped my AirPods.’

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Biggest flex is when your friend’s mom uses you as a good example.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

“You’re a cardiologist? Is that like a fancy name for an auto mechanic?”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Notice how you don’t catch me in public, it’s because i’m not real.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,682

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

Going viral on Facebook:

Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Don’t come to my house unannounced. I will stare at you from my window.

Going bananas on Facebook:

How old were you when you realized others couldn’t see the matrix?

Shared recently on YouTube:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

Spotted on Twitch:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

Going viral on Facebook:

The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on a pair of corduroys.

When you first meet a man, that fake version of him be so fire.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
That first impression could win an Oscar for Best Actor! 🎭🔥

dating, fake, fake version, fire, first meeting, humor, impression, man, meet, meeting, personality, relationship, version

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

0

6 months ago

communication, date, girl, going, humor, just, know, marry, relationship, say, something
If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

0

2 months ago

drunk, Easter, Easter egg, egg, eggs, fun, hide, hunt, knows, nobody, party, secret, surprise, where
Probably the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life, except for a bunch of other times.

0

5 months ago

depressed, depression, emotions, ever, except, health, humor, life, mental, mental health, most, sadness, self-deprecation, times
I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

0

2 months ago

Christmas, communication, expectations, gift, hello, holiday, humor, i, letter, only, relationship, Santa, say, short, something, touch, want, week
Being social sucks all my energy.

0

2 months ago

being, energy, exhaustion, humor, introvert, life, social, socializing
My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

0

2 months ago

battery, charged, excitement, exciting, guess, humor, i, nightlife, phone, sleeping, technology

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

43 shares on Slack this month:

You’d think a philharmonic orchestra would have at least one harmonica, but nope.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare.

28 shares on Discord this month:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s not getting better or worse, but rather a third mysterious thing.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Writing is so fun because you get to google things like “woman names”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Hello, I’m looking for the people who said “I’ll always be there for you”. Has anyone seen them?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

A fitness trainer showed me the proper way to inhale and exhale and then got pissed when I told her she had nice breaths.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

Spotted on WeChat:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

Going viral on TikTok:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I’m sorry I used air quotes when I said we were friends.

Trending via Twitch:

Your email finds me deeply unwell. Teetering on the edge really.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Breaking via Slack:

I believe that emails are trying to tell us something.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Spotted on Slack:

I miss when men had big hair, louder feelings, and leaned over cars to declare their love.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

When you first meet a man, that fake version of him be so fire.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

Probably the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life, except for a bunch of other times.

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

Being social sucks all my energy.

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨