Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Why do parents bust in your room like they trying to catch you cheating on them with another pair of parents or something?

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Look at you with tape over your camera, while Amazon, Facebook, and Google have your whole life on file.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

I always bring luggage when visiting my mom because I know she’ll send me on a guilt trip.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

You realize you’re getting old when your body parts start fighting over which one hurts first.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,614

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Old people get so mad when you’re young and tired.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Just found out my asexual friend was only using me for my companionship.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

Trending via Discord:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

“You look tired!” Bro, I want to stop existing.

6 days ago

Humorous text about exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed, with a playful, relatable vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic compliment that's actually an insult. 🙄 'You look tired!' is just code for 'Wow, you look like a zombie apocalypse survivor!' 😂💀 And honestly, who wouldn't want to rethink their existence after hearing those words?"

bro, dark, dark humor, exhaustion, existing, humor, i, relatable, stop, tired, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Messenger this month:

Let the kids believe in Santa. I believed the Undertaker and Kane were brothers.

38 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

24 shares on WeChat this month:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

21 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve spent years struggling to prove that the sunk-cost fallacy isn’t actually a fallacy. No sense in giving up now, though.

73 shares on Twitch this month:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

66 shares on Slack this month:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

86 shares on X this month:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

94 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Crossing my fingers one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Watching someone else control the computer and doing it differently than you would, is one of life’s greatest challenges.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Pouring Diet Coke directly into my gunshot wound.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“The engine light is on!” Yeah, that means it’s working.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,550

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

If “live each day as if it’s your last” means being paralyzed with anxiety and a sense of impending doom, then I am absolutely nailing it.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Please don’t invite me over if you have a leather chair that’s already peeling. I will peel it some more when you’re not looking.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Summer is the time when it’s too hot to do what it was too cold to do in winter.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Being insane should at least burn calories.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Saying “This reminds me of my early work,” as I walk past a Rothko.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

Going viral on WeChat:

Whole crypto scheme is built on people too dumb for crypto that aren’t self-aware enough to realize it.

Spreading quickly via X:

My favorite part of the Bible is where God says, put a cross emoji in your bio and cheer on the dehumanization of minorities.

Spotted on Discord:

I hope this out-of-office message finds you well.

Going viral on Snapchat:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Freshly posted on Threads:

At the job interview with one AirPod in.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I need a reasonable job. Something like $3,000 an hour. Nothing too wild.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Making waves on Facebook:

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

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