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🎄🎅 Pretty sure my wallet is already crying, so it must be beginning to look a lot like Christmas! 😂💸
Author Archives: slickboy
Girls flirt by orbiting your general location like an electron.
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When she’s got you spinning like you're the nucleus of a high school chemistry project 😂🔬💫
This entire year I was method acting. None of it was real. I was working on a bit.
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Next year's performance has already been nominated for the Drama Desk Awards! 🎭😂
Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?
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Trying to finish a bottle of Worcestershire sauce is like playing a video game on expert level 🎮🕵️♂️🥫
New term for people with jobs: emploids.
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Trying to become an "emploid" so I can get upgrades in coffee consumption ☕🔧
The year flies by when you’re scrolling.
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Time flies when you're having scrolls! ⏰📱😂
He’s called James Cameron because he turns the camera on.
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James Cameron: the only guy who sleeps with the lights on because he can't turn the camera off! 🎥😆
So stupid how New York is actually as cool as everyone says.
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Trying to find NYC's flaws is like searching for a Wi-Fi signal in a basement—good luck with that! 🗽😂📶
Do men know they don’t have to date if they’re not over their ex?
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Sounds like some men need to uninstall their "ex" from their operating system before downloading a new relationship 😂🤦♂️💔
My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I’ll eventually be able to get back in it.
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Rise and shine, only to recline! 😴☀️