Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Can everyone log off? 🚪 The 'Do Not Disturb' sign is up! 🙅‍♂️ Time for some solo virtual zen 🧘‍♂️. See you on the flip side of solitude! 😄"

alone, detox, digital, digital detox, everyone, humor, i, introvert, log, log off, need, right, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

0

5 months ago

bathroom, companion, dog, feels, flashlight, going, humor, me, mystery, next, night, nighttime, nighttime routine, pet, pet companion, routine, solve
I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

0

2 months ago

activity, childhood, culture, DuckTales, flex, fun, fun activity, intro, intro song, music, nostalgia, pop, pop culture, sing, song
The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

0

4 months ago

color, fact, food, humor, me, naming, observation, onion, purple, purple onion, red, red onion, someone, straight
Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

0

4 months ago

affection, back, emotional, emotional well-being, good, health, likes, liking, mental, mental health, mutual, mutual affection, relationship, someone, well-being
Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

0

2 months ago

alcohol, dark, dark humor, drinking, hours, humor, last, me, mortal, sarcastic, supernatural, tell, vampire, vampire humor
I don’t even get disappointed anymore. I’m just like, “Oh, again? Okay.”

0

2 months ago

acceptance, again, attitude, disappointed, disappointment, even, frustration, humor, i, just, oh, okay, perseverance, resilience

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Twitch this month:

All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

65 shares on Discord this month:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

64 shares on Slack this month:

Here’s to a new year of making the same old mistakes, but with far more enthusiasm.

17 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

89 shares on Instagram this month:

Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

99 shares on Reddit this month:

I never forget to eat, but I do eat to forget.

34 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

21 shares on Threads this month:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

From now on, I’m gonna tell guests that I made my house especially messy just for their visit. It was hard, but I got it done.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Making waves on YouTube:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Just shared via Twitch:

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Live now on Twitch:

This whole “having a job” thing is really getting in the way of me having my best life.

Just shared via Twitch:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Going bananas on YouTube:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Spotted on YouTube:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Just landed via Telegram:

Sorry I left you on read, I didn’t mean to open it just yet.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Can everyone log off? I need some time alone right now.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

I don’t even get disappointed anymore. I’m just like, “Oh, again? Okay.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨