Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Before I had kids I was only vaguely aware that Saturday had a 7am.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I love how women can go from obsessed to not interested at all when a man makes that one wrong move.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

With certain people, you get nauseous just hearing their name.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,554

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I’m not fragile like a flower. I’m fragile like a bomb.

Live now on Telegram:

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

Broadcasted on Threads:

IP address? You mean the bathroom?

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

This email could’ve been sex.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Strange new trend at the office. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Linda.

Breaking via TikTok:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

Co-worker: You look so unapproachable. Me: Yet, here you are.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your aura says "No entry" but people still knock on the door 🚪🥸

co-worker, conversation, coworker, here, humor, me, sarcasm, unapproachable, workplace

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

2 months ago

ago, couple, digital, digital life, escape, humor, internet, irony, life, media, modern, modern life, real, real world, social, social media, technology, today, world
I enjoy the freedom of speech, because if you let crazy people talk, they’ll totally tell you they’re crazy.

2 months ago

crazy, enjoy, freedom, freedom of speech, i, let, people, speech, talk, tell
My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

2 months ago

book, booking, bored, boredom, buy, flight, i, impulse, impulse buy, looking, start, toxic, toxic trait, trait, travel
Only a fool would use the toothbrush the dentist gives you. You think the dentist would freely hand you the tools that would keep them away?

2 months ago

away, care, dental, dental care, dentist, fool, hand, humor, irony, joke, keep, think, tools, toothbrush
You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

2 months ago

beautiful, beauty, combative, contrast, detained, humor, interaction, personality, personality contrast, questioning, sarcasm, situation, unexpected, unexpected situation
I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

2 months ago

barista, coffee, drink, foam, grande, hexagon, humor, hypothesis, i, ice, iced, iced mocha, just, mocha, no foam, order, people, random, random words, say, Starbucks, swear, vortex, words

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on TikTok this month:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

97 shares on Threads this month:

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

94 shares on Slack this month:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

31 shares on Instagram this month:

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

Anyone want to meet up and just scream… We could get food after.

36 shares on Slack this month:

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

Musk goes “exactly,” and it’s the stupidest tweet you’ve ever read in your entire life.

75 shares on YouTube this month:

Opening this app is like lighting a cigarette.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Some of you need to clean your room before you take a selfie.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Wow, this person is full of shit. Oh, I’m on my own page.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

My boss denied me a raise before my shift today. What’s some music you have never wanted to hear in a coffee shop?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Going viral on TikTok:

If someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll let you know. Get rid of those people.

Making waves on TikTok:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Just landed via Snapchat:

You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

The shitshow must go on.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

Going viral on Twitch:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m not addicted to Twitter. I’m just a really good listener so I want to know what everyone has to say.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Co-worker: You look so unapproachable. Me: Yet, here you are.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

I enjoy the freedom of speech, because if you let crazy people talk, they’ll totally tell you they’re crazy.

My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

Only a fool would use the toothbrush the dentist gives you. You think the dentist would freely hand you the tools that would keep them away?

You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨