Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

It actually is crazy how many people I know would benefit from being visited by three ghosts.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

You amuse me, Jester. You may enter my bed chambers.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

My love life feels like when you finally spot an open space in a full parking lot — and then boom, it’s a motorcycle.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Whoever’s praying on my downfall, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,541

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

This meeting could have been a cave painting.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’ve disappointed better people.

Trending via YouTube:

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Spotted on Slack:

Today I choose kindness, but we’ll see, it’s still early.

Shared recently on Slack:

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

Making waves on Threads:

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

1 week ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about the surprising fit of new underwear, highlighting humorous clothing mishap.

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Commentary:
When you realize you’ve been shopping in the "cloudy parachute" section but they fit like a glove 😂👙🌬️

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Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on YouTube this month:

I am convinced that at least half of you are bots.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

Ugh, those red and blue flashing lights are interfering with my driving and scrolling.

70 shares on Facebook this month:

Deja poo is when you feel like you’ve heard the same shit before.

18 shares on YouTube this month:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

97 shares on Threads this month:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve got a couple of eyebrow hairs that want me to be a villain.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

12 shares on Instagram this month:

You’re so productive for your wage.

51 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

New York is so awesome. Like, yes, let’s spend $108 for breakfast and walk past homeless people freezing.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

It’s the perfect time of year to focus on my indoor hobbies, like lying down in a dark room and feeling insane.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Muting morons is good for your health.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Totally forgot my demands now that I’ve strapped this ticking bomb to my chest.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Oh, to live in an apartment alone and do whatever I want.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Nobody should be blowing up Teslas. If you just wait a bit, they’ll probably do it by themselves.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Donuts have holes in them, just like acoustic guitars, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

If every lesbian is into older women, who’s gonna like the younger ones?

Shared recently on Reddit:

I bought all this healthy food at the grocery store today and now I’m trying to decide if I want Chinese food or pizza delivered for dinner tonight.

Just shared via WeChat:

If you have to remind them to give a shit, remind yourself not to.

Just landed via WeChat:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Going bananas on Discord:

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

Going viral on Messenger:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

Live now on Telegram:

It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Pugs look like regular dogs that ran into a door at full speed.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

No ChatGPT for me, thanks. I will be asking Liam Gallagher on Twitter.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨