Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I see 1000 girls. I know 100 girls. I talk to 10 girls. I love 1 girl. And she doesn’t love me back.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I forgot the word “espresso” so I asked the barista for a smaller, angrier coffee.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

763 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,925

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,925

Updated

27 minutes ago

Users Online

3,416

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Reddit:

About to form my very first opinion.

Going viral on Reddit:

Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Spotted on Pinterest:

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

Seen just now on Discord:

The cashier said, “Have a good day,” but she doesn’t mean it.

Breaking via TikTok:

Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Laundry day is my favorite day of the week. That’s why I dress for it every day.

Trending via TikTok:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Going viral on Threads:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Broadcasted on Slack:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Broadcasted on TikTok:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Don't worry, angel, I'll form a support group with the unicorns 🦄 and rainbows 🌈 to handle all this overwhelming perfection!"

angel, arrogance, beautiful, being, confidence, ego, humor, humor quote, me, perfect, sarcasm, self-love, soul, vanity

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

A gender-neutral equivalent of ‘sugar daddy’ is glucose guardian.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Valentine’s Day this week. If you have a crush on me we still have time to get cards and shave.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

You can never really “own” earbuds. You just have to appreciate the time you had together.

Making waves on Facebook:

The first time I saw a kiwi I thought it’s a potato with fur.

Just landed via YouTube:

Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Laptops become possessed with slowness when they see that you are in a hurry.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Live now on X:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Going viral on Instagram:

There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

Making waves on WeChat:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Everyone is awful in their own special way.

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

Be the reason your therapist reevaluates their entire career.

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

You know those lines you see painted on parking lots? I know this will come as a shock to some of you, but you’re supposed to park between them.

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

The only reason I insist on returning to the office is because my cat needs a break from me staring at him all day.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Happy birthday to everyone, for the rest of your lives. I can’t do this anymore.

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

I’m fairly certain the person who put the first “r” in February also decided how to spell Wednesday.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

I am not in a good place, geographically.

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏