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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Betrayal is when you’re holding a baby, and they put their arms out for someone else.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Exercise won’t cure your depression, but it can make you hotter than your enemies.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

6 hours ago

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Just landed via Slack:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Going viral on Snapchat:

I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m not athletic, but I’m good at jumping to conclusions.

Making waves on Snapchat:

An introvert walked into a bar. Just kidding. The introvert stayed home.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Oh, that’s nothing a sudden burst of completely disproportionate rage won’t solve.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If the number 666 is considered evil, then technically, 25.8069758 is the root of all evil.

Broadcasted on Slack:

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

Just landed via WeChat:

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Home » Funny Fun Quotes » Page 64

718 Funny fun quotes

More funny fun quotes 👇

Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Having a teenager is fun because the voice in my head that questions everything I do now has a friend.

Commentary:
"Parenting a teenager is like having an opinionated sidekick who critiques your every move… except they live with you. 🤔👯‍♂️ #TeenageTales #ParentingAdventures"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Commentary:
"Looks like the onesome turned into a twosome real quick! 😂💕 Who knew catching feelings could be so contagious?"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Commentary:
Sounds like they wanted a taste of the great outdoors but ended up with a front-row seat to a survival thriller instead! 🏕️🐻😅 Let's hope they don't get any ideas about bear encounters during their next camping trip!
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Commentary:
"Who needs a Fitbit when you have a passport to keep tabs on? Passport-checking: the latest travel workout trend! 💼✈️😂"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Commentary:
"Who needs the thrill of conquering Mount Everest when you can conquer the TV remote from the comfort of your couch with a bag of potato chips? 🏔️🥶🛋️ #AdventureVsLazySunday"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic progression of a night out: from admiring art to considering alternate modes of transportation! 🍸🍸🍸🛹 Who needs a taxi when you've got liquid courage and a skateboard waiting for you outside? Just be sure to wear a helmet – safety first, folks! 😄 #SkateboardRide #TipsyThoughts"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Me and the fellas making welcome gift baskets for the aliens.

Commentary:
"Looks like ET is in for a treat! 👽🎁 Who knew extraterrestrial hospitality involved gift baskets? Hope they come in peace, or at least with some intergalactic snacks!" 😄🌌
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Fun like a LinkedIn notification.

Commentary:
"Getting invited to that awkward work event you never wanted to attend is what I call fun, LinkedIn style! 🎉💼 #NetworkingNightmares"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Commentary:
"Well, a true gentleman knows that good manners apply even when dealing with vending machines! 🎩💼 Don't want those snacks to get stuck in a twist now, do we? 😂 #VendingMachineEtiquette"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Gonna take the kids to the planetarium so they can watch YouTube on their phones.

Commentary:
"Ah, the modern way to stargaze 🌌📱! Who needs constellations when you have YouTube, right? 🌟📺 #TechSavvyKids #StarryScreenTime"

For even more funny fun quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

6 hours ago

3,450

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

You know how a dog tilts his head and looks confused when he hears a strange sound? Yeah, that’s how I feel when some people are talking.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

Making waves on TikTok:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Just landed via X:

I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.

Trending via Snapchat:

It’s Monday, but at what cost?

Just shared via Discord:

Nobody watches you harder than people who don’t like you, so give them a show they will never forget.

Making waves on Discord:

We should all go into advertising and fix what’s going on with commercials. They need our help.

Making waves on Discord:

If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.

Going viral on Slack:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Going viral on Twitch:

My middle finger salutes you.

Spotted on Discord:

I think Australians should have to go three rounds in the ring with a kangaroo before they eat him.

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