Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

Commentary:
"Ah, the rare creature who finds work as fascinating as binge-watching Netflix. If only we could all be so easily entertained by spreadsheets and emails. Perhaps we should all take a lesson from this work enthusiast and learn to appreciate the art of procrastination… I mean, productivity."
5 months ago
Share →: They should invent weekends that are long-lasting.

Commentary:
"Imagine a weekend so long, by the time it's over, you've forgotten what day it is! 🤯📆 Who needs just two days off when you can have a never-ending weekend full of relaxation and procrastination? 💤⏳ Let's petition for the invention of the eternal weekend – because Mondays are highly overrated! 🙅‍♂️☀️ #WeekendGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

Commentary:
"Maybe take up bird watching – the only expense there is binoculars, and even those you can probably find a good deal on with a quick search online. Plus, birds won't judge you for having a budget!"
5 months ago
Share →: Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Commentary:
"Another productive day in the life of a couch tester! 🪑💼 Just making sure that seat cushion technology is up to par. Keep up the good work, couch potato! 🥔🛋️ #ProfessionalLounger"
5 months ago
Share →: The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Commentary:
"Ah, the simple joys of life summed up perfectly! 🍹🍹 Who needs profound existential questions when you can have two cocktails and a good meal?! 🍴😄 #LivingTheDream"
6 months ago
Share →: Petition to make weekends longer. Two days isn’t enough.

Commentary:
"Seriously, who do we talk to about extending weekends? It's like we blink and it's already Monday again! 🙈 Can we get a petition going for #MoreWeekendPlease? 📝⏳"
6 months ago
Share →: My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Commentary:
Ah, the elusive 'Couch Potato' pose – a true test of flexibility and balance for those of us dedicated to the ancient art of TV watching 🧘‍♂️🛋️ Remember, it's all about finding inner peace… and the right channel!
6 months ago
Share →: Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

Commentary:
"Remember the good old days when our biggest decision was choosing what snack to eat next? 🍕🎮 Let's all take a moment to honor the lost art of 'productive procrastination' aka chilling at your friend's house, contemplating life's mysteries like 'Should we watch another episode or call it a day?'"
6 months ago
Share →: Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Commentary:
Ah, the exquisite art of productive idleness! 🤹‍♂️ Embracing the Zen master within while also mastering the skill of couch potato-ing. 🥔💤 Who knew that the most fulfilling hobby could be found in the magnificent abyss of nothingness? Time well spent doing… nothing! 🌟 #MasterOfInaction
6 months ago
Share →: As a retiree, I have two pairs of pajamas. Bedtime and daytime. Sometimes I get them confused.

Commentary:
Oh, the struggles of retirement – battling the eternal pajama confusion! 🛌🌞 Let's hope you don't accidentally wear your bedtime pajamas to the grocery store or your daytime ones to bed! 😂 #RetirementGoals #PajamaProblems