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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

If I could do it all over again, I would ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Police cars should play ice cream truck music when they’re pulling you over for something minor.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and cursing because we’re staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1839 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,001

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

12,001

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Spotted on Facebook:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Only thing that can cure my depression is $500 million.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Making waves on YouTube:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I should’ve gotten my affairs in order before I decided to bite into this hot pepper.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Bands are always like “here’s another song”. Yeah, no shit, that’s pretty much all you do.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

Seen just now on X:

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1839 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,001

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

12,001

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Sometimes the best thing about my job is that my chair turns.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Having a teenager is fun because the voice in my head that questions everything I do now has a friend.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I only buy cookware with the handles that somehow get hotter than the pot itself.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Everyone focused on the lip filler, but it’s really the chin filler that is the real villain.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

The best way to reach me is with intelligence and humor.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone. But it will pass.

Trending via Instagram:

I be like, “Who’s praying on my downfall?” as if I don’t make self-destructive life decisions.

Live now on Telegram:

Love to come home after a long day’s work and relax with one thousand short-form videos.

Trending via Telegram:

Returning to Twitter is like coming back to a dysfunctional family.

Going viral on Threads:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Going viral on X:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

Reported on LinkedIn:

I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

Freshly posted on X:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

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