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Funny self-centered quotes

New funny self-centered quotes 👇

  • “She’s so self-centered.” Who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

    👇

    Commentary:
    “Of course, my life revolves around someone else… I just wish they’d stop spinning! 🌀😂”

  • Don’t forget to make everything about you today.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the golden rule of self-absorption!🌟 Remember, it’s your world, we’re all just living in it.💁‍♂️🌎 #MeMeMe”

  • When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

    Commentary:
    “Breaking news: Scientists have discovered the center of the universe… and it’s not your living room! 🌌😅 Remember folks, humility is always in style! #UniverseIsBiggerThanYouThink”

  • Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

    Commentary:
    Oh, poor Mercury, always catching the blame for retrograde! 🪐 Next time, let’s check in with the cosmic bodies before casting our astrological frustrations. Maybe Mercury just needs a hug and some retrograde appreciation! 🌌 #CosmicConsiderations

  • My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

    Commentary:
    🐶💁‍♂️ “Ah, the case of the egocentric pooch! 🚪🔔 Must be tough being the most popular pup in the neighborhood, huh? Just imagine the disappointment when he realizes it’s not a fan club gathering but just the mailman! 😂 #SorryBuddyNotToday”

  • Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

    Commentary:
    “Dear diary, sure hope you’re not feeling neglected from all my talk! 📖 Maybe you enjoy some quality ‘me time’ when I’m not around. 🤔 Don’t worry, I promise to spare you the drama… unless we’re writing a bestseller together! 🖊️😅”

  • At the gym, everyone thinks exclusively about how little weight I can lift and how quickly I’m out of breath, because the world revolves around me.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the gym, where the weightlifters envy your stamina and the cardio kings envy your strength…or is it the other way around? 🏋️‍♂️🏃‍♂️ In any case, it’s all in a day’s workout for the center of the universe! 😂”

  • The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the rare silver lining of dealing with egotists – their self-centeredness serves as a shield against all the gossip and drama! 😂🙌 It’s like having a VIP pass to a one-person show, starring themselves. 🌟 #EgoOnPoint”

For even more funny self-centered quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny self-centered quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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