Funny specific quotes

• People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

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  2 months ago

  always, commitment, commitment issue, dating, distant, emotionally, emotionally distant, eye, fish, got, humor, issue, issues, people, relationship, salmon, say, sea, specific

• I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

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  2 months ago

  fired, humor, i, job, joke, just, massage, parlor, people, reason, rub, specific, wrong, wrong way

• Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

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  2 months ago

  everything, humor, positivity, self-acceptance, self-hate, self-improvement, specific, specificity, stop, yourself

• I probably never die because I don’t finish anything without a specific deadline.

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  2 months ago

  deadline, die, finish, humor, i, life, motivation, never, procrastination, specific, task

• When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.

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  2 months ago

  always, aspiration, childhood, growing, growing up, humor, i, lesson, life, life lesson, realization, someone, specific, wanted

• Things were better when the computer lived in its own specific room, and you only went in there sometimes.

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  4 months ago

  better, computer, humor, lived, nostalgia, old, old times, only, own, privacy, room, sometimes, specific, technology, things, times

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