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Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Vatican City should be called Popenhagen.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Clicked on ‘Make a reservation’ on a restaurant’s page, and it opened FaceTime and started calling them. I cannot stress enough how much I do not want that to happen.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

I’m not a very good poker player cause my eyes turn into big dollar signs when I see that I have a good hand.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Drinking coffee because hitting people over the head with a shovel is frowned upon.

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Updated

Jan 20, 2026

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Seen just now on Snapchat:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

Broadcasted on Discord:

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

Going viral on Reddit:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Going bananas on Threads:

The spelling of “bourgeoisie” was intended as yet another means of oppression.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Not to brag, but I boiled the right amount of pasta. Once. Five years ago.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Going viral on Facebook:

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

3 weeks ago

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Trying to collect all three struggles like university Pokémon! 🎓💸😂

academic, emotional, emotionally, financial, life, struggle, student, student life, three, university

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92 shares on TikTok this month:

During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Find someone who cares about you as much as Gmail cares about new devices signing into your account.

29 shares on Threads this month:

Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

83 shares on YouTube this month:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

36 shares on Discord this month:

It’s normal that my retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding buried treasure at some point, right?

65 shares on Twitch this month:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

The share button on Reddit should be called Spreddit.

54 shares on Slack this month:

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

24 shares on Instagram this month:

Right before rock bottom, you’ll have a city builder game on your phone.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Golf would be more exciting to watch if they played naked.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a vacation… while still on vacation.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

My soulmate is chocolate cake.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Due to not wanting to, I will not be.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Captain America taught me that I just need to take performance enhancing drugs to be loved by everyone.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Caught my son chewing on electrical wires. So, I grounded him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

If trees offered Wi-Fi, we would plant more of them. Too bad they only produce this oxygen thing.

Just landed via Reddit:

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

Trending via Instagram:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Trending via Threads:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.

Shared recently on Discord:

Saying “essentially” is a more sophisticated way of saying “basically.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

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Activity Log ✨

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

I have a huge to-do list, I just have to figure out who’s gonna do it.

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

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