No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Maybe aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I hate it when I’m outside, and an insect lands and crawls on my glasses, and for a split second, I think aliens have invaded.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

If I say, “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared peer-reviewed research, data, and charts, and I will destroy you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.