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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Some people are storms dressed like sunsets. Beautiful from a distance. Dangerous up close.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

If you’re reading this, drink some water. You’re not a cactus.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Water is a drink whose flavor is its temperature.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,545

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,545

Nov 27, 2025

3,920

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

As a simulation, this all kinda sucks.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Just landed via Threads:

Taylor Swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

Live now on Snapchat:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Just landed via YouTube:

Sometimes I wish I understood what some of you said and sometimes I am happy that I don’t.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Seen just now on Instagram:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

Just shared via Telegram:

I swear, if my memory was any worse, I could plan my own surprise party.

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

3 weeks ago

Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Sounds like the element of surprise was working overtime in the office today! 🤪🤷‍♂️ 'Why hold the baby' – a hard-hitting question that left everyone speechless and giggling. Sometimes, it's best to just roll with the unexpected and embrace the comedic chaos! 😂👶 #OfficeAntics"

asked, baby, coworker, hold, humor, i, me, new, prepared, question, saying, today, unexpected, wanted

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,545

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,545

Nov 27, 2025

3,573

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I’m ready to try another planet.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

Trending via Slack:

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

Just landed via Facebook:

Super excited about a brand new week of questioning all my life choices.

Just landed via YouTube:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Just landed via Slack:

Keep scrolling, I’ve got nothing.

Spotted on WeChat:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Trending via YouTube:

I don’t wanna brag, but my posts are unpopular on all continents.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Making waves on Threads:

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

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