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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Some people are so judgmental, I can tell by just looking at them.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Girlhood is taking hundreds of pictures only to post one or none at all.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

355 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,624

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,624

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,574

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

Women only want one thing, and it’s the power to cast men who tell us to smile right into a pit of giant venomous serpents.

Live now on Reddit:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Shared recently on Slack:

Can you imagine if AI ever evolves into trying to kill us, and the thing that saves us is one of Cloudflare’s outages?

Unpopular opinion: Greek mythology needs more live-action movies. I’m tired of re-watching Percy Jackson.

5 hours ago

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Commentary:
Hades must be over there wondering why he's always left on read 📚🔱🎬

fan, fatigue, greek, Greek mythology, jackson, live-action, live-action movie, movie, movie fan, movie fatigue, movie remake, mythology, needs, opinion, percy, Percy Jackson, remake, rewatching, tired, unpopular, unpopular opinion

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There are more bots on here than in Star Wars.

2 months ago

bots, here, humor, internet, joke, online, sci-fi, star, Star Wars, technology, wars
If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

2 months ago

button, buttons, confusion, game, gaming, humor, i, indecision, know, life, press, procrastination, random, random button, right, time, video, video game, where
Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

2 months ago

apology, communication, enough, excuse, hang, humor, i, know, socializing, sorry, vocabulary, words
One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

2 months ago

burning, cd, day, even, last, last time, memory, nostalgia, outdated, realization, realize, technology, time
Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

2 months ago

bonsai, bonsai tree, broccoli, challenge, Chinese, Chinese restaurant, chop, dining, dining experience, dishes, eating, eating challenge, experience, feel, fit, food, food joke, humor, i, joke, mouth, restaurant, restaurants, tree, trying
Your password must contain a character… with a tragic backstory.

2 months ago

backstory, character, contain, humor, irony, password, security, technology, tragic

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

62 shares on Messenger this month:

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

39 shares on X this month:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

14 shares on Slack this month:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

88 shares on Slack this month:

If I had a dollar for every time someone called me fat, I’d probably just spend it on more bacon.

74 shares on Slack this month:

Why is nobody questioning the quietness of the cosmos?

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

I love it when God gives me money.

15 shares on Discord this month:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

I have tasted sending long paragraphs, and I have tasted saying OK. I highly recommend saying OK.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

An orgy where everyone looks identical is called a doppelgängerbänger.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Kanye is pretty mean for someone with ‘yay’ in their name.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I wish I had a friend like me.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Men who tell their woman she’s pretty, for no particular reason, keep that shit up.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I wonder if this next thunderstorm is thinking of me, too.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Dudes get a MacBook, and all of a sudden, they got work to do in public places.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?

Breaking via LinkedIn:

The universe clearly isn’t working as it should so someone should turn it off and back on again.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.

Shared recently on Messenger:

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Live now on Snapchat:

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Unpopular opinion: Greek mythology needs more live-action movies. I’m tired of re-watching Percy Jackson.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

There are more bots on here than in Star Wars.

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Your password must contain a character… with a tragic backstory.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨