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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

An agenda reveal party, where I surprise everyone with all the things I hope to accomplish this weekend.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

“Overdressed” is a social construct created by hating girls.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

The most important thing to remember when driving is that not everyone is smart.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

785 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,947

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,947

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Reported on Threads:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

Freshly posted on X:

I’ve decided that I need to eat more vegetables, so I’m gonna make a carrot cake later.

Reported on WeChat:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Just landed via Reddit:

Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Just landed via WeChat:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?
What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like someone's brain is doing some Olympic-level gymnastics trying to navigate the treacherous territory of social media and pet emotions! 🤯🐶🐱 Don't worry, your dog probably just wants to have a treat and a belly rub, not analyze your Instagram behavior! 😆 #OverthinkingChampion"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

785 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,947

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,947

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out… I mean, don’t they have thoughts?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Making waves on Instagram:

The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

Trending via Discord:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Shared recently on Telegram:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Reported on Reddit:

Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Just found out my asexual friend was only using me for my companionship.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

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