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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

They should invent a “stay signed in” checkbox that isn’t meaningless.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Your email finds me deeply unwell. Teetering on the edge really.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments under it.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Yes, I am super annoying, but don’t worry, it’s just permanent.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

I think probably the reason some people look better at 30 than at 20 is because they’re wealthier.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Missed garbage day today, if you’re looking for a bad boy that doesn’t play by the rules.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Some people get it. Most people don’t.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,308

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

Trending via Facebook:

It’s weird when you realize that what you thought was rock bottom was actually somewhere around rock middle.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

Making waves on Telegram:

The easiest diet is lack of money. You don’t have to do anything.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

A middle finger hits different when your nails are done.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Spotted on Discord:

It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

Just shared via Discord:

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

Going viral on WeChat:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

6 days ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about the effort behind everyday appearances, with a witty and humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Trying to achieve peak mediocrity takes some serious dedication! 🙄💁‍♂️ Who knew blending in could be so demanding? 😂"

appearance, beauty, effort, humor, know, looking, much, regular, self-deprecation, vanity

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32 shares on WeChat this month:

When you split a dessert, the waiter should bring two forks and one of those chess clocks you smack to let the other person know it’s their turn.

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My morning routine consists of talking myself out of quitting my job.

69 shares on Reddit this month:

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The hardest thing about chess is the other guy is always doing some shit.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a boy that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

70 shares on Twitch this month:

The thing about Pink Floyd is they take a little while to start singing.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

13 shares on Telegram this month:

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

When someone loses something, I like to ask helpful questions like ‘Where did you last see it?’ and ‘Where did you put it?’ and ‘Where is it?’

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

The best way to get through Monday is to pretend it’s Tuesday.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Whenever I’m not eating a breakfast sandwich I wish I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Had a shower and put on clean pajamas. It was a productive day.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

It is so weird that every single one of us is going to die, and we are not nicer to each other.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

Spotted on Threads:

I like to begin every day by looking forward to the end of the day.

Making waves on WeChat:

Jokes on you, unknown number. I barely answer my phone for people I know.

Just shared via X:

My husband refused to get glasses. But that was before he brushed his teeth with fake tan.

Just landed via Discord:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Going viral on Discord:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m lacking vitamin c-ash.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

That fight could’ve been an email.

You have to stay up as needlessly late as possible to make the next day as horrible and hard as possible.

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

Keep the laugh going 😂

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

That fight could’ve been an email.

You have to stay up as needlessly late as possible to make the next day as horrible and hard as possible.

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨