Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Sorry I left you on read, I didn’t mean to open it just yet.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

If you see me online, I’m not chatting. I’m busy ignoring the world and laughing at memes like it’s therapy.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Calling ahead to the cafe to warn them to “get those beans brewing”.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

“Just circling back on this.” – “Take another lap.”

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,510

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The human body is incredible. It’s like, “Oh, you’re stressed and sad? Here, enjoy this acne.”

Just landed via Telegram:

Don’t forget to make everything about you today.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Spotted on Slack:

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

Going viral on Slack:

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

Making waves on Messenger:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Having a job ruined my life.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Seen just now on Discord:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Every ‘c’ in ‘Pacific Ocean’ is pronounced differently.

22 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Trying to explain English pronunciation is like trying to un-mix a smoothie…🍹🤔🍌

C, differently, every, funny observation, language, letter, letter c, observation, ocean, pacific, Pacific Ocean, pronunciation, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

0

2 months ago

40s, adulthood, after, best, best part, car, comfort, day, heated, heated seat, humor, life, life transition, long day, seat, seats, transition, welcome
Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

0

2 months ago

2012, after, apology, defense, hand, humor, i, media, phone, post, second, social, social media, sorry, time
I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, before, box, feed, footwear, humor, i, joke, just, never, new, over, sh, vegan
Roman soldiers are all like “I’m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.”

0

2 months ago

ancient, ancient Rome, comedy, costume, fashion, fight, going, historical, historical comedy, humor, leather, leather skirt, roman, Roman soldier, Rome, short, skirt, soldier
My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

0

2 months ago

age, due, financial, humor, lack, life, life struggles, longer, love, me, money, relationship, sad, sadness, struggles, suffer
“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, answer, asked, beautiful, beautiful woman, dating, humor, inappropriate, inappropriate answer, interview, job, job interview, situation, social, social situation, weakness, woman, women, workplace

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

My tween would like you to know I ruined his life when I told him to stop being super sus and cringe and be more lit yo.

85 shares on Snapchat this month:

Some Uber rides in NYC are the same price as a JetBlue flight to Miami.

43 shares on Telegram this month:

Imagine hating on me and I’m just in my room also hating on me.

91 shares on Threads this month:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

11 shares on Threads this month:

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Just got chills imagining what Tom and Jerry could accomplish if they just worked together for once.

13 shares on Messenger this month:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

84 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

27 shares on Threads this month:

Parents be like “why aren’t you eating, don’t you like my food?” and after you eat a ton, they’ll say “you look a little chubby, maybe you should eat less.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

No pre-workout, just flashbacks of stuff I let slide.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

If three ghosts visited me on Christmas, I’d make them play Mario Party with me.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Is it stupid and irresponsible? Yes. Will it make me happy? Also yes.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I love when I clean my whole apartment just to sit in it like a Victorian widow waiting for bad news.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Wow, this was a really long day of playing on my phone.

Trending via Threads:

I have two reactions when I leave the house: Ew, the people. Ew, the weather.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’m implementing a new policy in my house: any child who is awake past bedtime can either go to sleep or clean the house, no exceptions.

Freshly posted on X:

The weather’s got more mood swings than a reality show reunion.

Just landed via Reddit:

Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I won $6 on a scratch-off last night. Out of my way, peasants!

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every ‘c’ in ‘Pacific Ocean’ is pronounced differently.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

Roman soldiers are all like “I’m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.”

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨