Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If you sit down to play a game of chess and your opponent punches you in the face, you’re not going to prevail by getting better at chess.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Girls on their period: stay away from me; I need you.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Polish girls are just winter Latinas.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,673

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Just landed via Discord:

You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

You’re not entertaining, you are exittaining.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Jesus died for your sins. If you don’t sin then he died for nothing!

Live now on Instagram:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

Going viral on YouTube:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Excited for my husband to get back from his trip, so I can sit him down for a little presentation of all the internet videos I saved for him to watch.

6 days ago

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Commentary:
"Welcome back, dear! Get comfy, because it's time for our internet marathon! 🎥🍿😂"

back, entertainment, excited, excitement, humor, husband, i, internet, internet video, little, presentation, relationship, saved, sit, surprise, trip, video, videos, watch

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

2 months ago

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People in NYC are like, let me know if you’re ever in NYC.

8 hours ago

city, city life, ever, humor, interaction, invitation, know, let, life, me, NYC, people, social, social interaction
What doesn’t kill you makes you wish it did.

2 weeks ago

adversity, humor, kill, life, pain, resilience, sarcasm, struggle, wish
My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

2 months ago

aging, body, body noise, breakfast, cereal, crackle, humor, joke, louder, noise, playful, pop, snaps
Playdates were invented to force parents into cleaning their home.

3 months ago

activity, child, cleaning, fun, fun activity, home, organization, parent, parents, playdate, socialization, visit
What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

2 months ago

date, decay, existentialism, humor, irony, kiss, observation, relationship, romance, society, watching

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Discord this month:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what?

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

94 shares on Telegram this month:

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

12 shares on Threads this month:

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

A pessimist is just an optimist playing hard to get.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

57 shares on Threads this month:

My doctor told me I should try anger management classes, and I’m still really pissed at him about it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Bro, you gotta try this high-protein Caesar salad, cold brew, air fryer, overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

It’s all fun and games until it’s 10 p.m., you’re all cozy in bed, and you remember you still have laundry in the washer.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

There’s a weird kind of grief that comes with late August, and I can’t explain it.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

People who don’t have Twitter are trying to show you stuff you laughed at a month ago.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

Making waves on Instagram:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Making waves on WeChat:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

If I was a microplastic, I would simply not go in the ocean or anyone’s mouth.

Seen just now on X:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.

Just shared via Discord:

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Trending via Messenger:

Do you use AI, or is the AI using you?

Live now on Pinterest:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Excited for my husband to get back from his trip, so I can sit him down for a little presentation of all the internet videos I saved for him to watch.

Keep the laugh going 😂

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

People in NYC are like, let me know if you’re ever in NYC.

What doesn’t kill you makes you wish it did.

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

Playdates were invented to force parents into cleaning their home.

What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨