Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Commentary:
Ah, the elusive 'Couch Potato' pose – a true test of flexibility and balance for those of us dedicated to the ancient art of TV watching 🧘‍♂️🛋️ Remember, it's all about finding inner peace… and the right channel!
6 months ago
Share →: When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Commentary:
Looks like a routine check-up turns into a family affair 🩺👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Don't mess with the blood pressure machine – it's a group activity now! 😂 #FamilyHealthChecks #TeamEffort
6 months ago
Share →: My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.

Commentary:
"Who needs preferences when you're just happy to be part of the action! 😄💫 Embracing versatility in the bedroom like a true team player! 🛏️👀 #JustHappyToBeHere"
6 months ago
Share →: The only team building exercise we had when I started working was called “Happy Hour.”

Commentary:
Looks like their team building strategy was to build relationships with the help of some liquid courage! 🥂 Who needs trust falls and trust exercises when you can bond over a few drinks instead? 😄 #HappyHourTeamBuilding
6 months ago
Share →: My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Commentary:
"Who needs a 401(k) when you've got a DeLorean 😎⏰ Blast from the past or leap into the future? The '80s are calling, and they want their parachute pants back! 🕺🕰️ #BackToTheFuture #RetirementGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Commentary:
🤣 Ah, the rebellious thrill of sharpening a pencil at the bin! It was our little act of defiance, our moment of clandestine coolness in the schoolyard. Who needs a cigarette break when you've got a freshly sharpened #2 pencil, right? Childhood priorities at their finest! 🚬📝
6 months ago
Share →: I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic mysterious husband move! 🤣🪚 Can't go wrong with a little bit of suspense in the relationship, right? Just don't accidentally start a horror movie plot in your backyard! 🔪😅"
6 months ago
Share →: A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Commentary:
"Introducing Unhinged: where swiping right means swiping left hooks! 👊💔 Who needs dinner and a movie when you can fight for love instead? Ready, set, punch! 💥😂 #LoveAtFirstFight"
6 months ago
Share →: Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Commentary:
"Apparently, mastering the Macarena doesn't come with a generous reward, unless you count confusing everyone at weddings as a valuable life skill 🕺🎶💃 #MacarenaFail"
6 months ago
Share →: Imagine hating me and im just at my desk spinning reeaaally fast in my office chair.

Commentary:
"Sorry to spin out of your hate radius! 🌀💨 Maybe my spinning chair is just dodging all the negativity coming my way! 😄 #OfficeOlympics"