Every morning I announce that Im going for a jog, but then I don’t go. It’s a running gag. Posted on2 days ago
If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box. Posted on3 days ago
Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale. Posted on5 days ago
If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?” Posted on5 days ago
Apparently you’re not supposed to announce that there’s been a death in the family every time you kill a houseplant. Posted on6 days ago6 days ago