Commentary:
Arrr matey, I'm in! Just as long as there's WiFi on the ship for posting selfies with the kraken 📱🌊🦑
68 Funny coming quotes
This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.
Commentary:
When your stomach is stuck in the greatest plot twist of all snack time 🍬😂🤔
Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.
Commentary:
"Guess I'll hold the fort here on Earth! 🚪🤦♂️🛸🌕"
If I go missing and you put my weight on that poster, I swear I’m not coming back.
Commentary:
"If you see a 'missing' poster featuring my real weight, just know I’m off the grid and living my best life 😂🏝️🚫🐱👤 #ForeverLost #WitnessProtectionDiet"
Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.
Commentary:
"Is it my joints or my morning cereal? 🤔🔍😂 #MysterySounds #SeniorSymphony"
A girl was coming over till she wasn’t—that’s what happened.
Commentary:
"She pulled a magic trick: now you see her, now you don’t! 🎩🪄🚪"
“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.
Commentary:
"😂 AI can take my job, but can it handle my caffeine-induced anxiety? I doubt it! ☕🤖💥"
Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.
Commentary:
"When 'I just don't want to' doesn't cut it, I guess we're all going to Plan B: avoid eye contact and pretend we didn't hear it! 🙈🤷♂️😂"
Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…
…
Commentary:
"Breaking news: Team Fire argues global warming. Team Ice counters with ice cream shortage fears. Tune in for the meltdown! 🔥🍦😂"
I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.
…
Commentary:
"Love the travel stories, but maybe it's time for a return trip! 🚀😄✈️"